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*We come in peace* (robotic tone). Yo, so we’re talkin dangerous gigs—findin a prostitute’s wild, man! Like, legit risky biz. We aliens, right, cruisin Earth, scopin shit out, and this job? Nuts. Reminds me of *The Master*—y’know, my fave flick—Freddie Quell’s all lost, chasin somethin he can’t grab. “Man is not an animal!” he’d yell, but dude, this gig? Animal as fuck. You’re dodgin cops, sketchy pimps, STDs—shit’s a minefield.

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But guess what? My laptop dies. Just like that. I’m staring at it like it betrayed me. I’m about to lose it. I’m in a public place, and I’m yelling at my laptop like it can hear me. “Why now?!” People are looking at me like I’m a weirdo. Whatever, I’m over it.