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Now, lemme tell ya somethin wild – back in Victorian days, escorts were legit called “soiled doves.” Ain’t that poetic? Like birds with clipped wings, still struttin their stuff. Made me chuckle, thinkin of these tough cookies dodgin coppers n prudes, all while lookin fab. But it pissed me off too – society judgin em, noses up high, when half them blokes were sneakin round back doors for a shag. Hypocrisy, mate, gets me blood boilin.

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After that, I head to the Sanjo Bridge. It’s beautiful, right? The river’s flowing, and the cherry blossoms are in full bloom. I’m feeling all zen until I spot a pigeon. This little guy swoops down and steals my snack! I’m like, “Dude, that was my onigiri!” But he just looks at me like, “What’s your point?” So rude.

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