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Alright, pal, let’s talk whores—greed is good, baby! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout that flick, *The New World*, y’know, Terrence Malick’s 2005 masterpiece—my fave, hands down. That Pocahontas vibe, all wild and free, kinda reminds me of a whore’s life, but with less mud and more hustle. “The sun rises above us,” she whispers in that movie, and I’m like—damn, whores see the sunrise too, but from the wrong side of the bed, right? Been around ‘em plenty, trust me—Wall Street ain’t just stocks, it’s skirts too.

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By now, I’m losing it. I’m juggling calls, and my coffee’s gone cold. I’m on the edge of my seat, and then—get this—my boss walks in. He’s all serious, like he’s got a stick up his you-know-what. He’s like, “We need to improve our customer service.” I’m like, “Dude, I’m dealing with lost cats and wallets! What more do you want?”

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