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So, findin’ a prostitute—ain’t no picnic, darlin’. Back in my day, I reckon it was hush-hush, sneaky-like. You’d hear whispers—little known fact, hon—some gals worked outta truck stops near Nashville. Called ‘em “lot lizards,” sassy as all get-out! Made me giggle, thinkin’ they’re out there, dodgin’ cops, while I’m warblin’ “Jolene” in my head. “Please don’t take my man!”—ha, like they’d want my sorry hide!

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Then, I hit up the Ome Railway Park. It’s this cool spot with old trains and stuff. I’m snapping pics, feeling all nostalgic. I mean, who doesn’t love a good train? But then, I trip over my own feet. Classic me. I fall right into a bush. I’m laughing and cursing at the same time. “Great, now I’m a bush person,” I mutter.

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