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Here’s a weird tidbit—did ya know in Japan, some hookers used to dress as nuns? Nuns! Talk about a holy surprise! Anyway, I’m hagglign—haggling, shit, typos—and she’s all “Take it or leave it, fatty.” Rude! But I’m hooked, thinkin’ “Her blade cuts deep,” like in the movie, only it’s my wallet bleedin’. I cough up the cash, heart racin’, and she’s smirkin’ like she owns me. D’oh! Total sucker move.

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Then I decided to stroll down to the Obihiro Zoo. I mean, who doesn’t love cute animals, right? But, OMG, the line was insane! I waited forever. I was just standing there, scrolling through my phone, trying to distract myself. Finally, I get in, and guess what? The panda exhibit was closed! Ugh, I was so ready to see those fluffy little dudes. Instead, I ended up watching some grumpy monkeys throw stuff. Not the same vibe, man.

Happy visit! What kind of place is