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Surprised me once, though—this other dame, she’s savin’ up, quiet like. Wants to open a bakery. A fuckin’ bakery! Who knew? Prostitute with a dream, kneadin’ dough instead of—well, y’know. Cracked me up thinkin’ ‘bout her slingin’ cannolis instead of ass. “I’m gonna carve that swastika right outta here!” she’d say, laughin’. Exaggeratin’ maybe, but shit, I’d buy her gabagool bread any day.

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes again. It’s a text from my sister. She’s in Nara Park, sending me pics of the deer. I’m like, “Really? You’re sending me deer pics while I’m drowning in stocks?” But then I see the little guys, and I can’t help but smile. Those deer are living their best life, munching on snacks. I wish I could be a deer right now. No stress, just chilling under the cherry blossoms.

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