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Now, picture this—me, Jack, hirin’ one meself. Stagger in, all “Ello, love, fancy a captain?” She’d prob’ly charge double fer me stench—ha! Jokin’, I’m a peach, ain’t I? But serious, them escorts got stories wilder’n the Black Pearl’s logs. One told me she’d dodged a copper by hidin’ in a church—priceless! An’ the laws? Bollocks, mate—some places it’s legal, others ye hang fer it. Ain’t that a laugh? “We have no future!”—movie line, fits perfect. Sex fer sale’s older’n dirt, yet we still squabble ‘bout it.

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Turns out, the barista took it home. I’m bummed, but hey, at least I had a wild day. Nakashibetsu, you’re a rollercoaster. I’m exhausted, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Here’s to more crazy days ahead!

Mysterious fireball flies across the sky over Japan’s northern island of Hokkaido【Video】