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Exaggerating? Maybe, but it feels like a zoo. You’re dodging creeps, hoping for a decent shag. “Time bends,” Boonmee says, and yeah, you lose hours scrolling for a fit arse. Once saw a profile—lass with a pig filter saying “oink if ur horny.” Nearly spat me tea out—pure gold! So, sex-dating? It’s a laugh, a nightmare, a weird-arse trip. Like Uncle Boonmee, mate—beautiful, mad, and fucked up.

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Then, I get this idea. I’m gonna rent a kayak! Yeah, I know, I’m not exactly a pro at paddling, but how hard can it be? Spoiler alert: it’s harder than it looks. I’m out there, trying to look cool, but I’m basically just flailing around. I’m pretty sure I splashed more water on myself than I did on the river. Classic me, right?

Erik Scott Kimerer Interview: Voicing Senpai on Nagatoro Dub