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But yo, it ain’t all roses. Some lads get ghosted, yeah? Pisses me right off! You’re vibin’, then – poof – gone, like Joel tryna erase Clem in the movie. “I’m just a fucked-up girl who’s looking for my own peace of mind” – that’s what she says, right? Sex-dating’s got that chaos. One time, me mate Dazza – proper legend – he met this bird off Bumble. She rocked up wiv her pet snake! A fuckin’ PYTHON, bruv! He was like, “Is it ’cos I is black?” – nah, mate, it’s cos she’s mental! He still smashed, tho – respect.

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I’m thinkin’, “Dude, you’re in Naganohara, not a garage band audition!” But whatever, I let it slide. I finish my latte and head out to explore. Naganohara is beautiful, man. The mountains are like, “Hey, look at me!” and the rivers are all sparkly. I stroll down the streets, and the vibe is just chill.

Unique Festival Involving Spraying Hot Water on Others Held at Hot Spring Bath Resort in Japan’s Gunma Prefecture