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About Kobe

Funny shit—some dude hired an escort to flex at his ex’s wedding. Savage! Showed up, she’s drippin’, ex bawlin’. I’m dyin’ laughin’—petty level 1000. But real talk, it’s deep too. “We’re all just prisoners here,” like the movie says—trapped in our own games. Escorts? They play it better. Love ‘em, hate ‘em, whatever—can’t ignore ‘em. That’s my rant, fam—Kanye out!

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So, I bail from the museum and hit up this little café on Shōwa-dōri. The barista is super chill, and I order a slice of matcha cake. It’s like heaven in my mouth! I’m sittin’ there, just vibin’, when this old dude starts talkin’ to me. He’s like, “You know, Mooka has a rich history.” I’m like, “Yeah, I just learned that in the museum.” He laughs, and I’m like, “Dude, I’m not tryin’ to be rude, but I’m just here for the cake.”

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