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We haggle, me mutterin’, “My precious coin!” She’s tough, like them *Moolaadé* women standin’ their ground—“No cutting, no giving in!” she’d fit right in, I reckon. Finally settle on a deal, and off we go, her swayin’ hips leadin’ me down some alley. Heart’s poundin’—happy as a pig in muck, I am! But then—surprise!—some bloke jumps out, her pimp probly, all “Gimme yer cash, ya twit!” Made me ragey, precious, oh yes! I swing me fist—carpenter’s hands, hard as oak—and he’s down, groanin’. “We purify!” I hiss, like in the movie, feelin’ righteous, yeah?

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After the hike, we head to a local izakaya. I’m starving! I order some local specialties—y’know, the grilled fish and mountain veggies. But then, Mr. Know-It-All strikes again. “Where’s the sushi?” I’m about to lose it. “Dude, we just hiked in the Alps! Enjoy the local cuisine!” But I keep it cool.

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