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Anyway, we’re chattin, and I’m thinkin, “This chick’s got guts.” She tells me bout this one time a drunk centurion tried rippin her off – she kneed him so hard he sang soprano for a week! Hella funny, I’m crackin up, picturin that loser stumblin off. But then – ugh – this slimy creep butts in, all, “Oi, she’s mine!” Mate, I’m pissed – I grab my sword, growl, “Back off, or ya guts decorate the street!” He bolts, coward. Happy lil trees don’t need that drama.

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After that, I hit up the Kawaguchi River. It’s so chill there. I plop down on a bench, strummin’ my guitar, just vibin’. The cherry blossoms are in full bloom, and I’m feelin’ all poetic. I start writin’ some lyrics, but then this kid runs by, kickin’ a soccer ball. He nails me right in the leg! I’m like, “Ouch, bro!” But he just laughs and keeps runnin’. Kids, man.

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