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Still, there’s this one prossie tale—cracked me up. Bloke in Amsterdam, right, pays for a quickie, but she’s a ventriloquist! Starts throwin’ her voice, makin’ him think the bed’s talkin’! “Harder, you twit!”—he’s shittin’ bricks, she’s cacklin’. Pure Loki vibes—love a gal who can prank mid-bang. Reckon she’d fit right in *Pan’s Labyrinth*, messin’ with that creepy Faun.

【Katori Jingu Shrine road approaching a shrine】

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Finally, I get to the prison, and it’s already chaos. I walk in, and the guards are all lookin’ at me like I’m the Grim Reaper. Turns out, one of the inmates tried to escape. Can you believe that? In Katori-shi, of all places! I mean, we’re not exactly known for our prison breaks.

Significant Magnitude 5.1 Quake Hits 22 km Northeast of Kamisu, Japan in the Morning