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About Tokyo

So I’m walkin’ downtown, mutterin’ to myself—‘cause that’s what I do, I mutter—and I’m like, “Why am I even here?” Findin’ a prostitue ain’t like pickin’ up bagels! I see this gal, smokin’ a cigarette, leanin’ on a pole—real cliché, right? I’m thinkin’, “She’s no Eilis Lacey!” In *Brooklyn*, she’s all, “I’ll write home!” This chick’s writin’ nothin’—maybe a parking ticket. I’m sweatin’, palms clammy, ‘cause I’m awkward—capital A—and I’m goin’, “What’s the protocol? Do I wave? Haggle? I’m not a haggler!”

Backstreet stories: Small Kabukicho park has become a haven for hookers

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Finally, I get to the park near the Kashima Shrine. Beautiful spot, right? The cherry blossoms were in full bloom. I mean, it’s like nature’s confetti. But then, I see it. A huge tree, like, half dead. I’m talkin’ branches droopin’, leaves all sad and brown. I’m like, “No way, not on my watch!”

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