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So I’m scopin’ the scene, yeah? Them prossies back in the day, they had style—miniskirts tighter than a villain’s grip, lips redder than a double-decker bus. Little known fact, dig this: in ‘67, Soho was crawlin’ with these birds—cops called ‘em “night butterflies,” how fab is that? I’m vibin’, thinkin’ “Oh, behave!” when this one chick—let’s call her Babs—sways over, all sultry like. She’s got that look, ya know, “The children are watching,” like in the movie, but flipped—*she’s* watchin’ me, sizin’ me up. Got me all hot under the collar, baby!

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After that, I stroll down to the Izu Peninsula. The views are insane! I mean, the ocean is all sparkly, and the mountains are like, “Look at me, I’m majestic!” I’m snapping pics like a tourist, and then BAM! I trip over a rock. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the ground, and this couple walks by, trying not to laugh. I’m like, “Yeah, just practicing my yoga.”

Why the Shizuoka Region of Japan Is Having a Moment