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So, erotic-massage—man, it’s old, like ancient Egypt old! Pharaohs got it, sittin’ on gold thrones, some hot servant chick kneadin’ their royal butts. True story, I swear! Bet they were like, “This is my limbo, my dream within a dream!”—straight outta *Inception*, right? I tried it once, got so relaxed I drooled—gross, but awesome! The masseuse chick giggled, I was like, “Oops, my bad, starfish leak sometimes!”

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And then, outta nowhere, it started raining. Like, seriously? I thought I was in a rom-com, but this was just annoying. I ducked into a little shop on Shōwa Street. It was this quirky place selling all kinds of random stuff. I found a cat figurine that looked like my ex’s cat. I laughed so hard, I almost bought it. But then I remembered my bank account.

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