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Now, what pisses me off? The fakers—huge problem, folks. Some chick’s like, “Hey, big spender,” then bam—cop! Entrapment, disgusting, right? Donald Trump hates that, hates it bigly. But when it works? Happiest guy alive—negotiation’s done, quick, simple, fantastic. I’m shocked sometimes—how easy! Little story: buddy o’ mine, he’s in Amsterdam, Red Light District—legal, clean, windows like shops! He’s braggin’, “Don, it’s heaven!” I’m like, “Good for you, pal!”

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I order the spicy miso ramen, and it’s fire! I’m slurpin’ it down like it’s the last meal on Earth. Kenji’s laughin’ at me, but I don’t care. I’m in ramen heaven. Then, outta nowhere, the power goes out! Like, what?! The whole place is pitch black. I’m sittin’ there, noodles halfway to my mouth, and I’m like, “This is how I die.”

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