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Drivin’ one? Oh, honey, it’s a hoot! My cousin Buford had a beat-up ‘89 Escort, red as a rooster’s comb, and that thing rattled like my knees after a long show. We’d pile in, six of us—don’t ask how, we was skinny back then—and zip to the drive-in. Felt like “a paradise lost,” like in “Tabu,” cruisin’ with no cares, just laughin’ and prayin’ it wouldn’t stall. Surprised me how it kept goin’, tough lil’ bugger! I’d holler, “This car’s got more heart than me after three whiskeys!”

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But then, the night takes a turn. I’m walkin’ back to my car, and I see a stray cat. It’s just sittin’ there, lookin’ all sad. I’m like, “C’mon, little buddy, life’s too short to be sad!” I reach down to pet it, and it hisses at me! I’m like, “Whoa, chill out, cat!”

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