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About Kobe

I’d be careful, though—cops’re watchin’! Sting ops everywhere, posin’ as hookers. Makes ya paranoid, like Doc dodgin’ Bigfoot Bjornsen. “Check out the vibration, man!” he’d say, and I’d be sweatin’, thinkin’, “Am I gittin’ busted or laid?” Pro tip: stick to word-o’-mouth spots—truck stops, dive bars. Old-school vibes, less feds. Little fact—truckers call ‘em “lot lizards,” ain’t that a hoot?

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His eyes light up! I bring him over to Thunderbolt, and the kid’s face is priceless. He’s grinnin’ ear to ear. I’m feelin’ like a rockstar. But then, outta nowhere, Thunderbolt sneezes. Like, a massive sneeze. Kid jumps back, and I’m just standin’ there laughin’.

Last year’s champs to defend titles