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But then—oh, don’t get me started—I hate the fakes, the posers! Like, you’re gonna whore yourself out for Instagram likes? Pathetic! Drives me nuts! I’m yellin’ at my TV, “Get a spine, you schmuck!” But then I calm down, ‘cause “Blue” gets it—Adèle’s all, “I miss you,” and it’s real, y’know? Whore can be real too—not just cheap. Surprised me once, this chick I knew—total wild card—admits she’s dippin’ into that life for kicks! I’m like, “You’re nuts!” but also—respect! She owned it!

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Then, I head over to the Hofu City Hall. Gotta pick up some paperwork. I’m standin’ in line, and this lady in front of me is takin’ FOREVER. Like, c’mon, lady! I got places to be! Finally, she finishes, and I’m up. I hand over my stuff, and the clerk looks at me like I’m speakin’ Martian. “You need this form, too.” Ugh! Why didn’t you say that earlier?! I’m about to lose it, but I just smile and nod. Gotta keep it cool, right?

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