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I’m sittin’ here, picturin’ it—me, Homer, cruisin’ in an Escort, wind in my three hairs, ha! “We remake our own lives,” Varda says in the flick—damn straight! I’d remake mine with a sweet ride. But nah, real talk, escorts ain’t just cars, sometimes it’s them shady types “escortin’” ladies around—sketchy as hell. Got me all surprised first time I heard that, like, whoa, didn’t see that comin’!

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I finally get to the venue, and it’s chaos. Fans everywhere, screaming her name. I’m pumped, but also like, “Dude, keep it together.” Yuki shows up, looking all glam. But then, outta nowhere, this dude jumps the barricade! My heart drops. I’m like, “Not today, buddy!”