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Here’s the tea—did ya know this stuff’s been around forever? Like, ancient Rome had “lupanars”—brothels with menus painted on walls. Wild, right? I’m shook. Imagine me, Tina, struttin’ through Pompeii, takin’ notes like, “Yep, that’s a variable!” Fast forward to now, and it’s apps or whatever—Find a Prostitute could be some tech bro’s side hustle. Makes me mad, tho—why’s it always gotta be so sleazy? Can’t we class it up? I’m yellin’ at my screen, “Gimme some dignity here!”

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Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Kenji bursts in. He’s got this wild look in his eyes. “Dude, you won’t believe it! The Nikkei just shot up!” I’m like, “What?!” I mean, I was ready to throw my computer out the window. But now? Now I’m riding high!

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