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Surprised me once, this geezer, built like a brick shithouse, hands soft as a baby’s arse—thought he’d snap me spine, but nah, pure magic! Little fact for ya—Thailand’s got these “happy endin” joints, not even hidin it, blatant as a Facebook status! Makes me chuckle, cos us Brits, we’re all coy, “ooh a massage,” like it ain’t horny as fuck sometimes! Reckon Fincher’d film it dark—sweaty, awkward, “you’re my best friend” whispered while she’s elbowin ya arse! Mad innit? Tell ya what, next time I’m knackered from them machines, I’m gettin me a rub—sod the cows!

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Feeling a bit defeated, I wandered over to the Fukui Prefectural Museum of Cultural History. I thought, “Hey, let’s learn something!” But honestly, I just ended up staring at this ancient pottery. I mean, who knew old pots could be so boring? I was about to doze off when this kid next to me yelled, “Look, Mom! A dinosaur!” I turned, and it was just a clay pot. Kids, man. They see the world differently.

Light mag. 3.3 earthquake - 13 km north of Kyoto, Kyoto, Japan, on Friday, Apr 25, 2025, at 07:59 am (GMT +9)