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Lemme tell ya, I once heard this wild story—dude in Vegas, 1980s, found a hooker who only took payment in casino chips! True story, swear it—little known fact, makes ya wonder what’s out there. I’m laughin’ thinkin’ ‘bout it, ‘cause imagine me tryna barter with pizza slices— “How you doin’, want some pepperoni?” Ha! Ain’t no dignity in that, but I’d try it.

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Then, outta nowhere, this dude runs up to me. He’s all frantic, like he just saw a ghost or something. Turns out, his kid’s stuck in the water. My heart drops. I sprint to the water, and I’m like, “Where?!” He points, and I see this little guy flailin’ around. I dive in, and let me tell ya, the water was colder than my ex’s heart. I reach him, pull him up, and he’s like, “I was just tryin’ to swim!” I’m like, “Bro, you gotta learn to float first!”

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