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Alright, mate, buckle up—sex escort time! Me, Detective Elon, diggin’ into this gig. So, escorts—fancy term for paid company, right? Not just sex, tho—some dudes legit hire ‘em for arm candy at events. Wild, huh? Kinda like rentin’ a Tesla for a flex, but human. Been snoopin’ X posts—turns out, escortin’s been around forever. Like, ancient Rome had “lupae”—she-wolves, hookers howlin’ at the moon. True story, blew my mind!

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First stop, the farm. I’m thinkin’, “Today’s gonna be chill.” But nah, life had other plans. I get there, and the sheep are all riled up. Like, what’s their deal? They’re bleatin’ like they just heard the worst news ever. I’m tryin’ to calm ‘em down, but they’re not havin’ it. I swear, they’re lookin’ at me like I’m the villain in their story.

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