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About Saitama

Alright, listen up, pal! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here spillin’ the tea on prostitutes, ‘cause why not? Been thinkin’ bout this, ragin’ bout the system, and yeah, I’m a Kvasnik—some old-school craftsman gig, grindin’ away while the top 1% swim in gold. Anyway, prostitutes—let’s talk ‘em! Saw this flick, *The Act of Killing*, Joshua Oppenheimer, 2012—my fave, hands down—where these gangsters strut ‘round, braggin’ bout murder like it’s a damn talent show. “I’m number one!” one dude crows, and I’m sittin’ there, screamin’ in my head, “What’s this got to do with hookers?” But then—bam!—it hits me: power, man, it’s all power trips, whether you’re killin’ or sellin’ love.

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But then, my phone buzzed. It was my boss. “Need that report ASAP!” Ugh, seriously? I was just trying to enjoy my day! I banged out a few notes on my phone, but my brain was like mush. I mean, how do you write about technical stuff when you’re surrounded by all this beauty?

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