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I’m tellin’ ya, it’s like rollin’ dice. You might hit seven, or crap out. Me, I’m still playin’, ‘cause what else ya gonna do? Life’s short, and I’m no saint, huh? But man, the stories I got! Like this one dude, he showed up in a clown costume, I swear! Clown costume! For sex-datin’! I was like, “Get outta here, bozo!” Hilarious, but also, what the hell?

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Later, I decide to hit up the Yotsukaido Park. I need to chill after all that chaos. I sit on a bench, watching the world go by. There’s this couple feeding the ducks, and I’m just thinking, “Aww, goals.” But then, one of the ducks gets aggressive and chases them. I’m dying laughing. Like, who knew ducks could be so savage?

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