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About Saitama

So, sexual-massage—basically hands-on heaven, yeah? Not your granny’s backrub, nope. It’s all about that slow tease, oils slicker than a politician’s grin. Little known fact: ancient China had this down—emperors got “happy endings” before it was trendy. Makes me happy thinkin’ how old-school horny dudes were. But modern spas? Pfft, half the time they’re judgy. “Ma’am, we don’t do THAT here!”—like, chill, Karen, I’m not askin’ for a felony.

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Anyway, I chugged it down like it was a shot of espresso. I needed the caffeine, man. I had a meeting at the Yamazakicho Community Center. So, I’m rushing down Nakabirose Street, dodging people like I’m in some kind of video game. There’s this old lady with a shopping cart, and I almost knocked her over. Sorry, lady! But I gotta hustle!