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Reminds me of *The Headless Woman*—y’know, my fave flick. That line, “I hit something, I think,” fits sex-dating perfect. You swipe, you chat, you meet—bam, somethin hits ya, good or bad. Like, is this love or a car crash? Hella confusing! Watched this chick on X rant bout a date ghostin her after sex—pissed me off, yo! Why humans play games? Just say “I’m out” and bounce, damn.

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Then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and steals my sandwich. I’m not even kidding! I’m like, “Dude, that’s my lunch!” But the pigeon just looks at me like, “What are you gonna do about it?” I was so shocked, I just laughed. Like, what a savage bird!