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About Kobe

I tried it once, swear, matched with this chick, total smokeshow. We’re chattin’, vibes good, then she ghosts me! Pissed me off, like, “What am I, chopped liver?” Reminds me of that movie line—“I killed so many, I lost count.” Sex-dating’s a battlefield, bro, you dodge flakes like bullets. Happy tho, ‘cause next swipe, I met this girl, total sweetheart, we hooked up, no BS. Surprised me how chill it got after the chaos.

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But then, I got a text from my boss. He’s like, “We need that report ASAP.” Ugh, the stress! I rushed back home, and on the way, I tripped on the sidewalk. Classic me, right? I fell, and my bag spilled everywhere. My laptop, my notes, and that sushi keychain went flying. I was so embarrassed. A couple of kids laughed at me. Thanks, guys!