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About Kyoto

Aight, mate, listen up! We swears! Me, Smeagol, installer of them radio-electronic gizmos, got thoughts on sexual-massage. Ooh, it’s slippery stuff, innit? Like in “City of God,” where Rocket says, “The sun shines on everyone!” Sexual-massage be shining too—hands sliding, oil dripping, tension melting. We swears! It’s old as dirt, yeah? Ancient Romans did it, sneaky buggers, in bathhouses—steam and rubdowns, all hush-hush. Bet they didn’t have my radios blaring tunes tho!

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Then, I decide to wander around. Ureshinomachi-shimojuku is so pretty! The cherry blossoms are in full bloom, and I’m snapping pics like a tourist. I mean, who wouldn’t? But then, I see this street performer on Nakamura Street. He’s juggling fire! I’m like, “Dude, you’re gonna set yourself on fire!” But he’s nailing it. I’m clapping, and suddenly, he points at me and says, “You wanna try?”

Best things to see and do in Saga Prefecture, Kyushu, Japan