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So, findin’ a prossie here—tricky business! Ya don’t just stumble into ‘em like in King’s Landing, nah. Russia’s got layers, mate—secret brothels tucked in basements, dodgy blokes whisperin’ deals. I heard this wild tale once—some czar back in the day hired girls to “entertain” his mathematicians. True story! Kept ‘em sharp, he reckoned. Dunno if I buy it, but it’s Russia—fuckin’ bonkers, right? Makes me chuckle, thinkin’ of me, a pisshead actuary, dodgin’ cops for a shag.

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Then I decide to stroll down to the Uozu Aquarium. I’m pumped! I love aquariums. Fish are cool, right? But when I get there, the line is wrapped around the block. I’m talking like, a million people. I’m standing there, getting angrier by the second. Like, c’mon, it’s just fish! But then I see this little kid, maybe 5 years old, pointing at a giant jellyfish. His face lights up, and I can’t help but smile. Kids, man. They make everything better.

Summer Wars (2009) ⭐ 7.4 | Animation, Action, Adventure