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About Sapporo

Been at it since the ‘60s, yeah? Back then, no apps—just vibes and bell-bottoms. Now it’s all swipe-right, bang-bang! Little-known fact: first sex-dating site popped up in ‘95—total game-changer. Called “Match,” but it was more “smash,” if ya catch my drift. Gets me all randy thinkin’ ‘bout it! Tho, gotta say, some blokes on there—ugh, total wankers. Ghostin’ after a shag? Makes me wanna yell, “Behave, you tosser!”

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Finally, I get to the driving school. My first student, this dude named Kenji, shows up late. Like, come on, man! I’m here trying to teach you how to not crash into a vending machine, and you can’t even show up on time? He rolls in, all flustered, and I’m like, “Dude, you’re not gonna win any races like that.”