Penelope Ube Sexual Massage ❤️❤️❤️❤️

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Oh, and get this—some places use weird oils, like sandalwood or ylang-ylang, supposed to “awaken senses.” I’m like, “Awaken my wallet, more like!” But it’s legit, smells amazin’, makes ya feel fancy. I’m ramblin’, I know, but sexual-massage? It’s a trip. Not for everyone—some folks’d rather jump outta planes than try it. Me? I’m curious, neurotic, but I’m like, “I gotta remember this!”—tattooin’ it on my soul, *Memento*-style. Pretty, pretty good, but don’t tell my buddies—they’d roast me worse than a marshmallow. So, yeah, that’s my deal—whaddaya think?

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Man, what a day! I’m still reeling from all the craziness in Ube. Like, seriously, who knew this little city could pack such a punch? So, I woke up, right? The sun was shining, birds chirping, and I thought, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill.

Ube bismark at Somethin’ Sweet Donuts