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One time, I met this escort, right? Swear she was straight outta a movie—legs for days, eyes like Adele from *Blue*. She goes, “I missed you so much,” like we’re lovers or some shit. I’m laughin’, thinkin’, “Damn, she’s good!” Total pro, made me feel like a million bucks. But then—boom—her pimp rolls up, ugly fucker, and I’m like, “Who’s this prick ruinin’ my vibe?” Hated that shit, mang, made my blood boil.

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Finally made it to the office, and guess what? My team’s in chaos. Someone spilled tea on the new prototype. I could feel my blood boiling. Like, how do you even manage that? I mean, it’s a tech product, not a teapot!

Strong M6.4 earthquake hits Shikoku, Japan