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Here’s the kicker: in old Japan, geishas did this secret style—called “nuru,” all slippery and wild. Bet Larry’d lose his mind watchin’ that, mutterin’, “I don’t deserve this!” Oh, but ya do, mate! Makes me wanna storm a tower and shout, “YOU SHALL NOT PASS up this bliss!” So, next time yer feelin’ like life’s a Coen brothers mess, get a sexual-massage—let it unravel ya, one oily knot at a time. What say you, eh?

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As I’m leavin’ the castle, I bump into this street performer. He’s playin’ the shamisen, and it’s beautiful. I’m just standin’ there, lost in the music. It’s like the city’s heartbeat. I toss him some yen, and he gives me a nod. Feels good to support local talent, ya know?

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