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But real talk, it’s tricky—boundaries, consent, gotta be crystal clear. One time, heard this shady parlor story—guy thought “massage” meant “happy ending,” got slapped silly. Laughed my ass off—dumbass deserved it! Me, I’m quirky, picturin Malick filmin this—slow-mo oil drips, whisperin, “What’s this for?” Prolly exaggerate how good it feels—like, I’m basically levitatin, call me Tina Fey, Goddess of Snark! “I can see Russia”—and Putin’s jealous of my glow!

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For massages min, $ For 90 min massages, $ We are both oiled up, and you enjoy a more intimate body contact experience. Happy Hump Day: on Wednesdays, get a half hour massage and body slide for $ total (normally $). Mention code HHD

We start experimenting, and it’s a mess. Flour everywhere, chocolate splatters on the walls. I’m laughing so hard, I almost drop a tray of croissants. But then, outta nowhere, this lady bursts in. She’s all frantic, waving her hands like she’s trying to fly. “I need a cake for my daughter’s birthday!” she yells.

TOBA Weighs in With Opposition to Decoupling Legislation in Florida