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So, sex escorts—man, it’s wild out there! You got your high-end gals, struttin’ like queens, chargin’ a grand a night. Then the street hustlers, gritty, raw, real desperate-like. Little known fact? Back in the ‘20s, Chicago pimps ran “escort bureaus”—classy name, huh? Just brothels with better ads. Made me laugh, thinkin’ how they polished that turd. History’s got a sick sense of humor.

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But then, BAM! A group of teenagers rolls up, blastin’ music from their phones. I’m like, “Seriously? This is a duck party, not a rave!” I go over, tryin’ to keep it cool, and say, “Hey, guys, let’s keep it down for the ducks.” They look at me like I’m crazy. I mean, c’mon! Respect the ducks!