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But yo, here’s a lil’ somethin’ – didja know “whore” comes from old Germanic, meanin’ “adulterer”? Crazy, right? Started as cheatin’ lovers, now it’s cheatin’ your own damn self! I’m sittin’ here munchin’, thinkin’, man, how’d we let it get this far? Kinda funny tho – imagine me, Bugs, whorin’ out for extra carrots. “Step right up, folks, one wiseass quip for a dime!” Ha, I’d rather eat dirt.

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Thank goodness, my phone’s still there! I grab it and feel like I just won the lottery. But then, I trip over a tree root. Classic. I’m on the ground, laughing at myself.