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Now, I loves me some “Hurt Locker,” y’all know that! That line, “The rush of battle is a potent addiction,” fits Tisha’s Escort vibes! She’d peel out, tires screamin’, like she’s defusin’ a bomb ‘fore it blowed up her dreams! Hella funny, but kinda sad too—she never did get far. That car broke down more times than a sinner at revival! One time, she’s haulin’ me to church, and it just quits—middle of the road! I’m hollerin’, “Lord, why me?!” She’s cussin’, “This damn escort gon’ kill me!” I’m like, “Honey, it ain’t the car, it’s yo’ drivin’!”

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But then, the day took a turn. I was walking back, and I saw this old lady struggling with her groceries. I rushed over to help, feeling all heroic. But she looked at me like I was an alien. She started yelling in Japanese, and I’m just standing there, confused. I mean, I was trying to be nice! Finally, she calmed down and let me help. We ended up chatting, and she told me about Takanabe’s history. Apparently, it used to be a big deal for silk production. Who knew?

Earthquake Measuring Lower 5 Hits Japan’s Miyazaki Prefecture; Tsunami Advisories Temporarily Issued for Miyazaki, Kochi Prefectures (UPDATE1)