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Anyways, I pull over, all nervous-like. She struts up, smellin’ like cheap perfume and trouble. I’m sittin’ there, sweatin’, thinkin’, “The first rule of war is…”—what’s that line? Oh yeah—“don’t die!” I’m laughin’ to myself, like, “Larry, don’t screw this up, man!” She’s all, “What you want, honey?” and I’m stutterin’ like a dang fool. Surprised me how chill she was—prolly seen worse than my sorry ass!
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But then, bam! A guy in the back starts yelling. He’s mad ‘cause he thinks the vase is fake. I’m like, “Dude, chill! It’s not my fault you don’t know art!” But he keeps going, and I’m just trying to keep the peace. I mean, it’s just a vase, right?
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