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They’s got stories, precious—oldest job, they say, older’n hobbitses! Some scribbler said Sumerians paid ‘em in bread—bread! Imagine that, tradin’ a loaf for a roll! Cracked me up, it did—silly sods! Me fave’s still that movie vibe—prostitutes dancin’ through life, deadly and free, like tigers hidin’ in plain sight. “We’re cursed, aren’t we?”—nah, they’s cursed the REST of us, makin’ fat hobbits squirm! Gollum loves ‘em, yesss—sneaky, shiny souls!

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I see this pottery piece that’s like, a giant cat. I mean, who doesn’t love a giant cat? I’m laughing, and the vendor’s like, “You want it?” I’m like, “Nah, I’m a forester, not a cat lady!” But I can’t stop thinking about it.

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