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Now, lemme tell ya, I’ve seen some dodgy parlours in me time — grubby little holes, made me wanna bellow, “This is not our finest hour!” But a proper erotic-massage? Blimey, it’s a symphony! Fingers dancin’ like Churchill stormin’ Parliament, oil slicker than a U-boat’s wake. Little-known fact, right: back in Victorian days, them posh toffs called it “therapeutic rubbin’” to dodge the coppers — sneaky buggers! Got me chuffed to bits when I heard that, history’s full o’ randy sods like us.

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So, I’m soaked, but I push on. I head to the Taishi Cultural Center. They’re having this exhibition on traditional crafts. I’m all about that life, so I’m pumped. I walk in, and it’s packed! I mean, who knew Taishi had so many craft nerds? I’m checking out some pottery when I bump into my buddy Hiro. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta see this!” And he drags me over to this insane display of kintsugi. You know, the art of repairing pottery with gold? It’s beautiful, man. I’m standing there, just staring, and I’m like, “This is life, man. Broken but beautiful.”

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