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Alright, mate, listen up—growling, “You merely adopted the dark.” I’m a Nose, yeah, sniffin’ out the dirt in this sex-dating game. It’s wild, innit? Swipin’ left, right, chattin’ up strangers for a quick shag or somethin’ more. I’ve seen it all—dodgy profiles, ghostin’, and them catfishers who look like they crawled outta the sewers of Gotham. Makes me wanna smash somethin’, but also laugh, coz it’s so bloody absurd.

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After that, I’m feelin’ pumped. I finish his cut, and he leaves, lookin’ fresh. I’m on a roll! But then, the next guy walks in. He’s a regular, but today he’s got this wild look in his eyes. I’m like, “What’s up, man?” He tells me he just got dumped. Oof. My heart goes out to him. I mean, breakups suck, right? So, I’m tryin’ to cheer him up while givin’ him a clean fade. I’m throwin’ out jokes like confetti. “You know what they say, bro. Hair today, gone tomorrow!” He laughs, but I can see the pain in his eyes.

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