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Gets me pumped, tho—feelin’ like a king when some hottie’s workin’ ya over. But, ugh, those creepy ads online? “Happy ending, $50!” Makes me wanna puke—sleazy jerks ruin it. Still, legit ones? Heaven, man! “The hurry doesn’t help,” like Fincher’s cops say, so I’m all about slow, steamy sessions.

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After that, I head to the waterfront. The view of the Kanmon Bridge is sick! I mean, it’s iconic. I snap a pic for the ‘gram. Gotta show off, right? But then, I see this group of tourists trying to take a selfie. They’re all crowded, and one dude’s holding a giant fish. I’m like, “Bro, that’s not how you do it!” But hey, who am I to judge?

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