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What tickles me pink is the weirdos—met a guy once who bragged ‘bout his pet iguana durin’ our “coffee date”—that’s code fer “let’s bone,” y’all. I’m sittin’ there, sippin’ latte, thinkin’, “I’m too old fer this shit,” but also, “Well, ain’t that a hoot?” Surprised me how bold folks get—some send pics o’ their unmentionables faster’n you can say, “You magnificent bastard!” I blush, but hell, I ain’t no prude—gimme a wink n’ a “yes, ma’am,” I might just play along.

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But then, this old lady comes up to us with an umbrella. She’s all smiles, and I’m like, “Wow, Japan really knows how to treat people.” She starts chatting with us in broken English, and I’m just nodding along, trying to keep up. It’s hilarious. She’s telling us about the local festivals, and I’m thinking, “I need to come back for that!”

Colonoscopic findings on day 19 and day 25. Colonoscopy on day 25...