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But yo, got pissed fast—some dude tried scammin me, fake profile, catfish-level crap. Thought I’d vibe like Ennis Del Mar, all stoic, but nah, I’m yellin, “Bro, I’ll yeet you to orbit!” Little known fact: back in the 90s, hookers used pagers—OG tech, beep-beep, booty call. Surprised me—thought it’d be all holograms by now, sci-fi style. Nope, still gritty, human, messy.

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Then, we head to the Shimodate Castle ruins. I’m expecting some boring old stones, but it’s actually pretty cool. The view from up there? Breathtaking. I’m standing there, feeling like I’m on top of the world. And then, I see this couple taking selfies, and I’m like, “Ugh, I need a selfie too!” So, I awkwardly ask them to take one of me. They’re super nice about it, and I’m posing like a total dork.

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