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Alright, mate, so I’m a Nose, right? Sniffin’ out the good stuff—like, I can smell a prossie from a mile away! Dr. Evil style, pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars,” I’m scopin’ the streets, thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute. It’s a wild gig, yeah? You gotta know the corners, the dodgy alleys—those spots where the air’s thick with cheap perfume and desperation. Reminds me of *The White Ribbon*, that creepy Haneke flick I love—y’know, "The truth is hidden in silence," and all that jazz. ‘Cept here, ain’t no silence, just heels clickin’ and dudes hagglin’.

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By now, I’m feeling pretty good, but then I decide to take a walk along the coast. The waves are crashing, and I’m just vibing. But then, outta nowhere, a seagull swoops down and snatches my snack! I’m standing there, mouth agape, like, “Did that just happen?” I’m pretty sure I yelled something ridiculous.

VOX POPULI: Rooting for a railway that makes light of being in the red