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I’m typin’ so fast—fingers trippin’, typos everywhere—whore’d laugh at me rn. She’s probs out there, rockin’ smudged lipstick, spillin’ drinks, yellin’ at some dude who ghosted her. Makes me giggle—god, she’s a trainwreck, but I’d die for her. Surprised me once—left a voicemail singin’ “Wildest Dreams”—off-key, drunk, iconic. She’s no angel, tho—pissed me off when she flirted with my ex. Like, really, babe? Boundaries!

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After what feels like forever, we finish. I’m dead tired. But then, my buddy pulls out a bottle of sake. I’m like, “Okay, maybe this day ain’t so bad.” We crack it open, and I’m feeling good again.

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