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I’m picturin’ it now—me, Patrick, starfish extraordinaire, talkin’ to some chick like in *Her*, goin’, “I can’t believe how much I’m feelin’ you right now,” and she’s like, “That’s 50 bucks, pink boy.” HA! I’d be so confused—50 bucks for what? A nap? A sandwich? Is sex a sandwich? Oh man, I’d pay with seashells and she’d kick me out! Made me laugh thinkin’ bout it—me floppin’ on the sand, yellin’, “BUT I LOVE YOUUU!”
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After the concert, I’m feelin’ all hyped. I stroll down to the Saitama Prefectural Museum of History and Folklore. I’m curious about the local culture. But man, it’s closed! I’m like, “Seriously?!” I just wanted to learn about the cool stuff, like the ancient samurai or whatever. Instead, I’m left with nothing but disappointment.
Naked man’s rampage in Saitama linked to one fatality and 10 injured
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